How Self-Love Can Supersede Immense Pain

The paradox of your internal and external relationships

Emily Jennings


The search for self-love
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Sometimes we need a relationship with another person to find self-love. We spend so much energy searching for someone to love and to love us in return, but many of us reach a point in our lives when we discover that the love we were seeking all along resides within the self. It’s not in another human or the relationship between ourselves and someone else. It’s just in us.

All relationships are a mirror. All relationships help us explore the self. We are all searching for love — the one thing that can make this whole existence have any meaning. The paradox is that we need to have a relationship with another person to find the love that was always within. That’s because other people’s love (or lack of it) mirrors the love situation within ourselves.

The Universe Seeks Love

We are parts of the universe, and the universe is trying to understand love. So, as a part of that whole, you are also trying to understand it. But we find it through interactions with other people — something the greater universe can’t do.

It sees us as itself — and it is trying to find self-love, too. So, when we love each other, we help the universe love itself.

Reality is a multi-tiered system at which every level is seeking love.

We find love through interactions with others and through looking within simultaneously. Each of us is also a universe that has parts, and our parts need to find love as well — so we have to focus on self-love along the way. It’s not always clear how to do this. There is no instruction manual explaining love. We’re figuring it out as we go, along with the greater universe itself.

External Love and Heartbreak

I have a daughter and parents who I love very much and who love me. Thank goodness for that! I know there is love in the universe. They love me and direct my attention to the fact that I am lovable.

Sometimes, the universe affords me a chance to love someone outside my family circle. Sometimes in life, a person crosses my path for a while and forms a bond…



Emily Jennings

Wellness & Oneness, Consciousness, Spiritual Enlightenment, Twin Flames, and a Little Bit of Silliness | IG: @wellness_oneness |